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    Cant Stop Thinking About Her And Only Had One Date

    Tony Apr 28, 2013

    1. Tony

      Tony New Chatter

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      Ok so I went on a date with this girl a couple of days ago. We met on a dating website and have been chatting on and off for the past couple of months. When we started chatting I had just come out of a relationship, so wasn't even looking for anything heavy. I joined the site to try and get me out again and meeting people, for friendship if anything. Over the past couple of weeks I have been txting and speaking on the phone to this girl even more, to the point where she asked if I wanted to meet her. I was delighted and of course I said yes. One of the things that become apparent when we were chatting was she seemed very self contious and did not feel good about herself. Whenever I gave her a compliment her initial reaction would be telling me she doesn't believe me because she cant imagine herself being attractive to anyone. and that she will never believe me until after we have met. I really cant understand why she doesn't feel good about herself and doesn't think she is attractive. I think she is stunning and has alot of qualities, which I have pointed out. Anyway we arranged to meet locally to where I live and she offered to pick me up and go to a pub a few miles down the road. Much to our disappointment the pub was packed, not what you want on a first date when you want to get to know eachother lol. So anyway she said lets go for a drive round so she took me for a long drive and we stopped at a place that had fish and chip shop and I offered to buy her some food as she said she had not eaten all day. During our time in the car and when we arrived at this place walking round I felt we were getting on great. The conversation was flowing nicely, we were joking around and taking the mick out of eachother (only messing around, was nice) and I was becoming more and more attracted to her as the date went on. To the point where now I actually cannot stop thinking about her and cant wait to meet her again. I asked her after the date how she felt and she said she is not sure if she is attracted to me but she would like to see me again. I dont know if this is a good sign or not. I mean I am happy she wants to see me again and I am really hoping after a couple more dates she may become attracted to me as well. Is it really possible to feel this way after a first date? do you think there is a chance she could be attracted to me and feel same, I mean although thats not what she said, she has agreed to another date. I am wondering if due to the fact she is very self conscious and cautious she is perhaps just treading very carefully. I just couldn't ever imagine feeling so excited over someone after a first date. Its like my heart is racing, theres this aura around me when I think about her. Its crazy. What do you think I should do? does it sound like there is a chance with her? My plan is to try to be patient and hope that over time she will feel the same. I gave her a kiss at the end, she didnt hold back but didnt seem very comfortable. I think maybe I just need to be gentle with her and it could be shes been through some bad stuff I dont know. A part of me feels crap in case this doesn't work out, I cant explain it.
       
    2. Shortie861

      Shortie861 Administrator Staff Member

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      I agree with what you are saying about the whole keeping it gentle, it may be for the best doing that until she gets used to things and being around someone new. Sometimes it can be disappointing knowing that they are not attracted to you like you are them but I wouldn't let that put you off maybe being a good friend to her if it does come down to that.
       
    3. Naiwen

      Naiwen Chat Addict

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      Always, there is a chance & some hopes for everything, Young Man!
       
    4. Tony

      Tony New Chatter

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      Another thing I forgot to mention was the fact that a few weeks ago she decided she didn't want to chat anymore because she felt we didnt have anything in common. Then, 5 mins later she txted me saying she didn't mean it and the only reason she said it was because she is very unsure of herself and doesn't think anyone would like her or find her attractive. She just seems so self conscious and can be very negative about herself when there is absolotely no need. She agreed to a second date, so surely she must be in some way interested in me. I think she doesn't want to admit to any feelings of attraction in the event she feels she cannot go through with anything due to her insecurities and playing it safe. She may have been treated badly by guys in the past. I have to say there are some lads who do not treat a woman right.
       
    5. Naiwen

      Naiwen Chat Addict

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      Is she of your culture? If an Asian woman or lady, this might be because of her parents not approving of her or not. If not, she's just low in self-esteem.