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    I've got this friend

    Rachel Oct 14, 2012

    1. Rachel

      Rachel Quiet Chatter

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      Ive got this friends, hes the definition of amazing!!! ive know him for 7 years give or take...theres been weeks of time that we havent talked then when we picked up where we left off its like we never had stopped talking. me and him are exactly alike but yet soooo totally different. hes like the friend everyone wants. Hes been there for me in hard times and ive been there for him.

      i dont know how to tell him what i really think. its hard 1. because ive got someone special in my life 2. hes got someone special in his. and 3 he lives all the way in california and im in texas.

      Although the guy im talking to makes me feel utterly amazing each and everytime we talk this friend of mine turns me into the little grade school girl who has a crush on the cute kid in class....

      idk what to do
       
    2. Naiwen

      Naiwen Chat Addict

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      Oh, i'm sorry to hear it... I've figured to just let it go.
       
    3. Shortie861

      Shortie861 Administrator Staff Member

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      Been in this same situation before myself and from experience I would say it's probably better left as it is. My reason for saying that is because usually things will take a step further not go as you planned and you then end up falling out and not even being friends anymore. You will always have him as a friend and I am sure he will always be there for you no matter what :)
       
      jnugget likes this.
    4. Rachel

      Rachel Quiet Chatter

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      i know. but its been 7yrs. and im just at the point where idk if i can hide the feelings much longer. no matter what we will be friends even if something happens and it doesnt work out. im just so frazzled
       
    5. Shortie861

      Shortie861 Administrator Staff Member

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      I can imagine :) it's not a great situation to be in I will admit. Have you considered telling him how you feel and see what he thinks about it? May not be much but it may help you with him knowing how you feel.
       
    6. jnugget

      jnugget Regular Chatter

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      i have to agree with shortie on this one lets say you take it to the next step and it turns into dating and all that.. the relationship will change your feelings will change everything will just get messed up its best if they are left as they are.. but the choice is yours
       
    7. Rachel

      Rachel Quiet Chatter

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      Ive been thinking bout telling him. ima wait til he calls again one day...better to say it over the phone then through a text or email
       
    8. Kaynil

      Kaynil Quiet Chatter

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      I agree in letting know your feelings. Don't be martyr about it and keep it inside of you while everything spins around the world, take control of your life.

      First of all you have to define your own situation:

      A) you say you have someone special in your life. How much does this person matters to you? Do you see yourself growing old with your current partner?

      B) I am sure this friend is amazing, but are you able to see 'flaws' and things that tick you off? Don't minimize them because you have to accept they will be there. I am sure he is great but you have to think in the not-so-great moments too, as the way you two have handled fights and all really helps you see this person beyond this aura of perfection you may think the relationship would have if you both were free.
      Also, are you sure it is love what you feel for your friend? Are you ready to commit yourself and go through tears and sacrifices in order to reach the point where you two can be together?

      I know some of this also depends on him, but right now it is important you know how you feel about it, so you can decide whether is worth pursue it or not. I am sorry if I may seem rude and my questions are not so much for you to answer me but for you to think deeply and find within you what it is.

      I went through something very similar so I don't want to simply say "do it" or "don't do it", things are not black and white. What if he is in the exact same situation that you? Then you both silently 'accept your destinies' without being completely happy. No. I think it is best you do talk about it, calmly and see what your friend feels. For what you say he is probably going to be understanding and will tell you if he feels the same way about you or not. Unless you do it rashly I don't think something drastic is going to happen if he doesn't return your feelings. It may get awkward for a while and he may even ask for some time, but if you two keep in touch you can still have that amazing friend, have released the load consuming you inside and both of you moving the direction you want. well, maybe things won't go exactly that way because we're not all the same, but lets be positive. Letting things go by and living a life as a bystander is not worth it.

      I really wish you the best of luck for whatever is about to unfold in your life. Know that you have in this forum a place where we are ready to listen and support you through hard and good times. :)
       
    9. Rachel

      Rachel Quiet Chatter

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      A) I cant say that i do cuz its way too early on you know. but theres the possibility there. this someone special of mine is absolutely indescribable. His name is Kelly.
      B) I can ABSOLUTELY see my friends flaws. yess he does do things that piss me off and i do the same with him. its always unintentional. but we see through them and look into the real person inside. Weve had the not so great moments. we always talk through the tough sitiuations and come out on top. weve been to hell and back over the last 7yrs. weve had days even weeks and rarely months where we dont talk but like i said when we start talking again its like we pick up where we left off. yess i hate the fact that its like that but i think thats what makes our friendship so perfect. BTW my friend that im speaking of his names Ricardo. I know if we were both free we would be talking alot more and what not if you know where im coming from. I love him yess as a friend hes been there for me i can count on him for anything. i can call him at 3am and talk and he will always answer and im the same with him. I mean im willing to do ANYTHING for him. im not going to leave the guy im currently with cuz hes done nothing to me. hes absolutely amazing. but if anything goes wrong with me and Kelly that i will always be friends with him. but i do feel that i would be ready to go through anything to do what it takes to be Ricardo's. weve talked bout it before and weve agreed for the time being that we'll just be friends and if something comes of us in the future great...if it doesnt were both not going to be hurt. no matter what hes always going to be one of my best friends.

      I appreciate it highly actually cuz your questions are actually making me think deeper into the situation. Ive got 2 amazing guys in my life well other then my dad ones my best friend and the other ones mine.

      things are far from black and white. there are so many variables that will affect the decision in the long run. i know either way ill be happy. Im not sure what his true feelings are and im honestly afraid to ask cuz i dont wanna ruin things. i know nothing can ruin what we got but theres always that risk...and im willing ot take it im just afraid.

      i appreciate it more then i can say.
       
      Kaynil likes this.