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    some wiseguy 1 liners

    wiseguy Mar 12, 2012

    1. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      Just been to the gym. They've got a new machine in. Could only use it for half an hour, as I started to feel sick. It's great though. It provides me with everything I need - KitKats, Mars Bars, Snickers, Crisps, the lot.":run:
       
    2. Shortie861

      Shortie861 Administrator Staff Member

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      :haha: that's a good one :D
       
    3. Naiwen

      Naiwen Chat Addict

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      lol, for a moment, i thought you meant machine as a sports machine like the treadmill and whatnot. And yeah, the joke's funny.
       
    4. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
      Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
      as the beers wear off:giggle::giggle:
       
    5. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      Women are Angels
      And when someone breaks their wings....
      they simply continue to fly.........on a broomstick..:showoff::giggle:
       
    6. APS

      APS Administrator Staff Member

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      If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit join our club - Weightwatchers :)
       
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    7. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects. [​IMG]
       
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    8. Shortie861

      Shortie861 Administrator Staff Member

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      :giggle: good one wiseguy :)
       
    9. Grungie

      Grungie Raging Alcoholic

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      My last girlfriend called me a pedophile. Pretty big word for a 12-year-old.
       
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    10. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      oh dear lol

      i actually went to school with a lad called peter file,thats no lie
      and also a lad called richard head:giggle:
       
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    11. Reverse-gfx

      Reverse-gfx New Chatter

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      hahahhahahaha
       
    12. Psuedo

      Psuedo New Chatter

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      It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
       
    13. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      Religion should be treated like your private parts. Proud as hell, but wrong to force on others.

      Just sayin.....[​IMG]
       
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    14. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      I was just advised that it's almost National Cleavage Day.

      But I'm afraid it could be a booby trap...
       
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    15. APS

      APS Administrator Staff Member

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      If women are so perfect at multi-tasking, how come they cannot have a headache and sex at the same time?
       
    16. Grungie

      Grungie Raging Alcoholic

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      Abortion - it brings out the kid in you.
       
    17. APS

      APS Administrator Staff Member

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      Did you hear about the device that makes cars go 90% quieter? It fits right over her mouth
       
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    18. wiseguy

      wiseguy Chataholic

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      :giggle: love them carry on
       
    19. APS

      APS Administrator Staff Member

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      Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
       
    20. APS

      APS Administrator Staff Member

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      War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
       
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